I pledge to fuck you America!

The GOP's Pledge to America is a free flowing river of horse shit drafted by a bunch of fucking used car salesmen pandering to the whims of a bunch of self-proclaimed patriots and capitalists who only care about those parts and actions of the government that serve their interests while everything else is about spreading socialism and faggotry.

The phrase "no shit?" repeatedly springs to mind while reading through the pages of the Pledge to America. It is, without question, an explosive expose on the secret inner workings of the U.S. government that should not be dismissed, and by that I mean blown off completely.

"An arrogant and out-of-touch government of self-appointed elites makes decisions, issues mandates, and enacts laws without accepting or requesting the input of the many." -A Pledge to America (page 2)

"Politicians in Washington have imposed an agenda that doesn’t reflect the priorities of the people. What’s worse, the most important decisions are made behind closed doors, where a flurry of backroom deals has supplanted the will of the people." -A Pledge to America (page 5)

As you can see, the Republican party blows the lid off the government's incompetence and shenanigans. Most likely they'll replace all that shady dealing shit with something totally in your face when they reclaim power. All the doors will probably be removed from everyone's offices so nobody will try anything underhanded and sneaky.

Pledge to America is all about cocks and haircuts

The entire Pledge to America contains a lot of useless regurgitated bullshit. It's strong on official sounding terms about American government and policy, cluttered with shittastical charts detailing a lot of government dumbfuckery along with images of immaculately groomed Republicans with expensive clothes and $2,000 haircuts, but some of them didn't have much hair so they had regular cheap haircuts because who wants to spend $2,000 on a fucking haircut when the hair is really only growing out of your ears and on the sides of your stupid empty head which means a man who claims to be conservative only is conservative if his haircut only cost him $9 instead of the elitist sum of $2,000, and they're all engaged in various civic activities with a bunch of geriatrics who are just happy to get out of the house and probably can't hear what's being said anyways.

Lots of shit in the Pledge to America makes no sense. Even the shit that makes sense makes no sense  because it's nothing revolutionary, it's not even thought provoking.

The GOP wasted their time and tax money with this bullshit. Nobody cares about it. They don't need it to defeat the Democrats during the elections this time around because Obama and the Democrats, despite being handed the greatest opportunity in modern American history to reshape her economic foundations, after taking their oaths and settling into their offices, promptly set out to shit all over the average American by handing billions of fucking dollars to a bunch of corrupt, wealthy, blood-sucking corporate sleaze bags so they could maintain the status quo for another 100 years, and despite being dense as fuck sometimes, the American people haven't forgotten or forgiven that.

But it doesn't matter who replaces the Democrats, be it a Republican or some whacked out variation of one such as a Tea Party candidate, America will still be fucked, it will still be owned and operated by corporations and lobbyists, and the politicians will do their bidding whether they like it or not.